Do you struggle to connect with others? If so that fight might have something to do with where you have placed your focus. When we meet people, we inherently put our radar up. We immediately scan how different we are from each other.
I remember years ago being encouraged to host a couple’s bible study. I was super excited until I saw one particular couple; Edward and Susan had enrolled in the group. They were what I called heavy hitters in the church. I was sure they would attract more couples like them. These were people I had labeled as very different from me. A couple we would never pick as our friends, nor would expect them to desire our friendship.
My mind was so focused on what made us different; I refused to look at what made us the same. For example, if one had a particular struggle in life – Edward and Susan had the perfect verse all memorized and ready. For me, I struggled with memorizing verses. Talk about great prayers – they could pray these long, eloquent prayers with big powerful words – mine were more along the lines of – “Hi God – It is me.” This pair dressed up – I wore jeans. Bible reading was a daily practice in their lives, and at that time I read the bible only to do my homework for our small group.
When we focus on what makes us different, we fail to connect.
At first, I struggled to connect with this couple, but as I grew to know them, I found we had so many similarities that made us the same. Our biggest similarity was our love for GOD.
The differences that I let divide us at first ended up being places of growth and comfort in my life.
Don’t let focusing on differences keep you from connecting with other people. Look for what makes us all the same.
This video says it all.
Face your struggle of connecting with others. Focus on your sameness.
Is it difficult for you to focus on what you have in common?
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