When we embrace worry, our hope will rise, and we will be better equipped to persevere well in the midst of the unexpected.
Photo by Boram Kim on Unsplash

Have you ever noticed when jolted by unexpected circumstances, our fear response tends to unleash a strength and courage we never knew we possessed? We do the impossible! But then, as the fear subsides, we quickly replace it with worry, which begins to eat away at our vitality. Don’t let this happen to you; find out how to embrace worry in the unexpected.

What is Worry?

Worrying is like taking fear and adding past experiences, imagination, nightmares, thoughts, and feelings. Fear and anxiety help us when in danger or prepare us for upcoming circumstances. We are not intended to stay in a position of fear and anxiety. Worry keeps us in that place, and it tends to hurt us, exhaust us, and keep us stuck in a vicious cycle. Click here to learn to distinguish between “Fear, Anxiety, & Worry.

But I Don’t Worry!

Exactly what I thought! However, the reality is we all have concerns to some degree. Maybe in our everyday lives, when things are status quo, we have it all under control. But eventually, our journey here on earth will dole us with unwanted circumstances where we can’t see through the fog.

Will you be ready with tools in place so worry doesn’t get the best of you?

When Your Worst Fear Comes True

When your worst fear comes true, it ushers in a slew of worries—even for the best of the non-worriers. I found this out the hard way when my most significant distress reared its ugly head.

Mom Failure – seemed to be stamped upon my forehead.
My children were not thriving, and their struggles were beyond my capabilities.
I was not enough!

No longer could I kiss away the pain, protect them from the unknown, or spare them from the suffering that was undoubtedly ahead. Mental illness had come to dwell and rob them of so much, and there I stood, feeling helpless.

Have you ever been there when you wanted desperately to take away the pain of someone you love?

When Fear Turns to Worry

Your struggle may not be the same, but somewhere along life’s journey, you will meet the unexpected, and once the fear recedes, you are left with worries you must embrace to move forward.

Hanging on to Worry Is a Choice! Click To Tweet

When my children were first diagnosed with a mental illness, I let the fear hormones kick me into overdrive, and I was on fire. I studied mental health, took classes, consulted with professionals, and pushed myself beyond what was humanly reasonable. Rarely did I slow down to breathe, let alone embrace worry.  

I tried to push aside all uncertainty as if I had control. 

I figured they had no power if I didn’t acknowledge the concerns. But in my many hours of waiting for a positive response, the worries crept in. The bright future we had planned was now a distant memory—the what if’s tormented my mind and ached in my soul, leaving me emotionally exhausted.

What if—

  • my child doesn’t survive? After all, I know the statistics.
  • life never resumes to normal?
  • my child hates me forever for choosing treatment far from home.
  • I’m not enough?
  • God chose the wrong mom?
  • their mental illness is my fault?
  • my child never gets better?
  • my marriage can’t survive?
  • I make a mistake?
  • we run out of money for treatment?
  • I’m not doing all I could be doing.
  • the doctor gets it wrong?
  • I can’t keep my child safe?

This semi-non-worrier had met her match, and it was taking a toll. It became apparent that walking around with a list of worries would wreak havoc on me and that I would never be equipped to be the mom God chose me to be.

Hanging on to worry is a waste of time and energy. Embrace worry today and give it to God! Click To Tweet

Pretending worry isn’t there doesn’t help. However, focusing on it will only drain us of the energy needed to fight our battles. We all have a role to play amid our unexpected circumstances. But if we let concerns crowd out the voice of God, we will miss our opportunity to do what helps.

We must learn to embrace worry and give it to God.

When we embrace worry, our hope will rise, and we will be better equipped to persevere well in the midst of the unexpected.

 

How to Embrace Worry in the Unexpected

1. Identify Worry Behaviors

Most people do not realize when they are worried, so you must look for the behaviors. The most common worry habits are avoidance and procrastination.

Some other problem behaviors to look out for might be seeking assurance in relationships, superstitions, compulsive behaviors, a twitching eye, an unexplainable illness, and much more.

2. Notice and Name Your Thoughts

Instead of trying to push away your thoughts, please take a moment and acknowledge them. Write the thoughts down and say them aloud. Don’t get too attached to the ideas; notice and name them as if they are floating down a river.

3. Accept Your Circumstances

All the worrying in the world will not change what is happening. However, accepting your circumstances will allow the opportunity for change. Acceptance never means you like or agree with what is happening, but you solely recognize –
It is what it is!

This one took me by surprise. However, it works. But don’t take my word for it – try it and see if it makes sense to you.

4. Live in the Present Moment

We can’t change the past or predict the future, so why be consumed by either? Live in this moment!

If it is a painful moment, some are; at least you will only suffer this present moment, and it holds enough pain by itself. Don’t add the past suffering or predict what is yet to come.

Get through one moment at a time.

5. Count Your Blessings

Focusing on gratitude will help you pull out all the joy the present moment offers.

"Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ, Jesus."
Philippians4:6-7

6. Fix Your Eyes on Jesus

God cares about our worries and doesn’t want us to carry them alone. Keep your eyes on him, and know he will never leave you. 

"Let us keep our eyes fixed on Jesus, on whom our faith depends from beginning to end. 
He did not give up because of the cross!" 
Hebrews 12:2

7. Let it Go

Letting it go is different than pushing it away. You can’t release something until you have accepted it. This step is crucial to your well-being.

The best way to let our worries go is to give them to God, where they belong. Some people write it down, put it in a worry box, or bury it.

For me, I clench my hands tight, palms up with my nails digging in as if I will never release the worry at hand. Then I pull them towards my heart, and with a quick movement, I open my hand and fling my concerns to God as if I am placing them at the foot of the cross.

It reminds me,

God is in control, not me!

When we embrace worry, our hope will rise, and we will be better equipped to persevere well in the midst of the unexpected.

It Takes Practice to Embrace Worry and Give it to God

These tips take practice, so do not give up too soon. Start small! Pick a minor concern and walk through the seven steps above. Before you know it, you will begin to sense the difference it makes. Then you will be ready to tackle the significant concerns in your life.

I would love to say I have overcome and conquered worry, but that wouldn’t be true. As I sat today defending myself about why I had procrastinated with a difficult task, I recognized the worry buried deep within. I will repeatedly repeat the steps above as new and old concerns surface.

Worry will hurt us and those we love, and it will creep up like a thief in the night and rob us of the joy and energy we need in the midst of the unexpected. Start today by giving your worries over to God. We must travel light if we are to endure and persevere well. 

As we put our concerns at the foot of the cross, we will recognize God is in control. It makes the journey more manageable when we quit hanging on to the illusion we are in control. Let God be God.

When we embrace worry and give it to God, our hope will rise, and we will be better equipped to persevere well. Click To Tweet

What steps do you take to embrace worry and give it to God?


It is a great honor to join Alisa Nicaud’s “from FEAR to FREEDOM” blog tour. Click the picture below to take you to a complete list of the 30 blog posts on breaking free from fear. We no longer have to live a life of fear because we can choose to live boldly and bravely.

  



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34 Comments

  1. Worrry is thief, isn’t it Maree Dee! I love Philippians 4.6-7. It give us such great and yet simple instructions for handling worry. Pray about everything and be thankful! It’s not as if it’s a magic formula though it would be nice if it was. It’s a process. But as we repeatedly take our worry to the throne of grace and focus on all our blessings, we can let go of it. Thanks for sharing.

    1. Donna, I absolutely agree. We can let go of our worry. Thank you for stopping by. Blessings to you. Maree

  2. Thanks for sharing these edifying thoughts on navigating worry, anxiety and fear. These are good for realigning perspective and looking to the One who calms all our fears.

    Blessings,

    1. Yes, we need to keep our eyes on the One. I love how you put it – the One who calms all our fears.” Thank you. Maree

  3. This is my biggest take away from your article: We are not intended to stay in a position of fear and anxiety. Worry keeps us in that place, and it tends to hurt us, exhaust us, and keep us stuck in a vicious cycle………..I LOVE THIS PIECE FROM YOU! Thanks

  4. This lifetime worrier appreciated very much the insights you shared.

    ” Worry is like taking the fear and adding past experiences, imagination, nightmares, thoughts, and feelings.” I thought your words here were so profound.

    The Lord has recently been doing a great work in me with my anxiety and worry and between my Bible reading, sermons, books, prayer and meditation, He has taught me a lot of what you shared here. I love when I receive further confirmation from Him.

    Thanks so much for sharing.,

    1. Karen – I too love when God keeps sending us the message he wants us to learn. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Maree

  5. Such truth, Maree Dee! I’ve been reading through Luke and recently came to the place where Jesus was commanding His disciples not to worry. But like you’ve pointed out, sometimes we don’t even know we are worrying! So I’m trying to pay closer attention to those thoughts and take them captive, like you’ve suggested. Also, I’m so glad you are pushing past your fears regarding your children’s burden in life. It’s so easy to do when it comes to our kids! But I’m praying you feel a peace about them and that they thrive in spite of the challenges they face in life! I’m pinning and tweeting!

    1. Thank you for taking the time to comment. Your words of encouragement about my children made me smile and reminded me to keep putting my trust in God so I can feel his comfort. Blessings, Maree

  6. I feared up reading this because the fact that everything is fine right now scares me. Because every time things have been “just fine,” life slams me. But you are right. I have to acknowledge my worries. I can’t just push it aside as useless. I must accept it, and then give it to God again and again. Thank you for this!

    1. Oh, I can relate to things being fine and the fear of the bottom dropping out. Thank you for sharing and stopping by. Praying life doesn’t slam you for a bit, and you can enjoy where you are at for the time being.

  7. Thank you, Maree! Your honest sharing and practical tips to embrace worry are a blessing to me, especially at this time. I keep reminding myself, ‘let God be God’, but I’m definitely a work in progress. Thankful for His faithfulness.

    1. Carlie,

      I am so glad my words were a blessing to you. Your words have done the same for me this morning. Happy Easter! Maree

  8. Such a good description of worry. “Worry is like taking the fear and adding past experiences, imagination, nightmares, thoughts, and feelings.” Great tips. I’ve heard #3, when it is a tough thing to accept, called radical acceptance. Accepting that it is, can be freeing and allow us to move onto the next step.

    1. Theresa, Yes acceptance is hard. When I discovered “radial acceptance” it got easier. I would say aloud, “I am going to “radically accept” then I would willingly give it a whirl. Maree

  9. What a fantastic article Maree! I feel much more educated about worry and fear. You truly explained it so well. I too found acceptance as a key step on my ability to persevere and have peace in the midst of a great trial. God showed me that although I submitted to His will, I was not accepting it. There is a difference. Acceptance brings peace through trusting in His plan even when it differs from mine. It let’s go of anger and bitterness. Thank you for this post! Well done!

    1. Gretchen, Thank you for your beautiful words of encouragement. I am so glad you like the post on worry. I struggled big time with the acceptance part until I started practicing it. At first, it felt like I was giving in but later I discovered acceptance is key especially if you want change to happen.

  10. Maree, this is such a truth-filled post. This morning I was reading Matt. 6:34 and my commentary states this: “The Greek word translated “to worry” literally means “to be drawn in different directions.” Worry pulls us apart. It will pull us in every direction but to Jesus unless we bring it to Him. May we do so each day and find ourselves trusting Him with our concerns. Blessings!

    1. Joanne, Thank you for adding more on the topic of worry. I didn’t know the Greek meaning. I love the translation. Yes, we need to bring it to Jesus, daily. You have prompted me to do that before I close my eyes tonight. Thank you! Maree

  11. Worry takes our freedom in Him away doesn’t it! I grew up in an environment where the size of worry equaled the size of your love – big worrier equaled big love. I am so glad I don’t live that way any more! Your post is such an important lesson in living faith and hope!

    1. Wow, that must have been very difficult growing up with worry equaling the size of your love. I am so glad you don’t live that way anymore.

      I love what you said,”worry takes our freedom in Him away” Such a true statement.

      Happy Easter! Maree

  12. Oh, Maree, you’ve shared such needed words here today, reminding me that God is in control — not me! No matter the situation, He’s still a good, good Father who has the best in mind for me.
    Thanks for your vulnerability about your own struggles, which gives me so much hope.
    Blessings to you and yours.
    Marva | SunSparkleShine

    1. Marva, I am so glad my sharing gives you hope. I too needed the reminder tonight God is in control. Thank you for your words. Happy Easter! Maree

  13. Great job, Maree, and practical to boot. I love: naming your worries and watch them float down the river. Yes, I may need to give them a boot as well. Did you see I gave up worrying for Lent? It’s over tomorrow. I think I’ll keep it going. (:

    1. Sue, I didn’t see that you have given up worry. Wow, I am so proud of you. How did it go? I hope you keep it going. Happy Easter! Maree

  14. I am in a very bad place …holding on to hope.. ..I am taking meds for high Anxiety and Depression.
    It is easier said than done
    Past few days in mental agony and thinking if things don’t work out here, do I go back to Nashville ..
    Please God help me…..I am in the middle of a big Life Crisis

    1. Kalyani – I am so sorry you are in such mental agony and the middle of a big life crisis. Please know I am joining you right now in prayer. Although, I am not a professional, please feel free to email me. If you want to chat or have more specific requests. It would be an honor to pray alongside you. mareee.dee@embracingtheunexpected.com

      You are right it is easier said than done to not worry. Please know the type of worry I am talking about is not at all the persistent worry that goes along with an Anxiety Disorder. I am so glad you are proactive in seeking treatment through meds. Thank you for sharing. I hope you have a great professional who can help you with skills that might help too.

      Blessings, Maree