Do you assist someone in need on a regular basis? How emotionally prepared would you be if the person you care for faced a crisis or an unexpected situation arose while you were meeting someone else’s needs? Caring for another human can be emotionally taxing and takes great resilience and strength. Will you be prepared? Discover five effective strategies to build emotional strength as a caregiver. These ideas will also help boost your resilience.
Who is a Caregiver?
But first, who is a caregiver? Caregiving encompasses many forms of support, including looking after an aging parent, aiding someone in post-surgery recovery, supporting a person navigating mental health issues, parenting, offering assistance to someone battling cancer, nursing a friend through an injury, or catering to the needs of an individual with a disability. Essentially, caregiving arises when one extends help to those unable to meet their needs.
You might not be a caregiver now, but life’s unpredictability can change that instantly. Recently, the roles reversed, and I depended on my family for everyday tasks such as tying my shoes, transportation to medical appointments, grocery shopping, and meal preparation. My family stepped up admirably to provide care.
What happens when you’re the caregiver, and there seems to be no end to the care you provide? Do you ever worry that your emotional strength might not be enough to sustain you? #caregiver #emotionalstrength Click To TweetUnpacking the Emotional Toll
The emotional, psychological, and physical toll can be significant to the person in need; however, please don’t underestimate the toll it takes on the caregiver. I know firsthand that caring for loved ones with mental health challenges is an honor full of blessings but can also be exhausting.
Cultivating emotional strength and resilience is not merely advisable but crucial for the well-being of caregivers. Equipping ourselves with tools will enhance our ability to navigate the highs and lows of caregiving and provide unwavering support without giving up.
It’s common for caregivers to feel guilt when considering their wants and needs, as well as emotions like frustration, loss, overwhelming sadness, anger, anxiety, worry, and helplessness. Plus, as caregivers, we are susceptible to the emotional toll of witnessing our loved one’s struggles.
The emotional toll for caregivers can be overwhelming, yet often, carers neglect to acknowledge and address their emotions, choosing to prioritize the needs of others. #caregiving #emotions Click To TweetHow many of you jump in to help without considering the emotional impact it will have on you? Or pause long enough afterward to acknowledge your emotions and feelings?
Depletion of Reserves as We Give
We use up our reserves with each unexpected turn and hour we give of ourselves. And if that emotional strength and resilience evaporates, we will be forced to give up on those we love. However, through trial and error, I have found five strategies that make a difference.
Five Effective Strategies to Build Emotional Strength and Boost Resilience
1. Nurture Your Faith
Begin today; don’t wait for a crisis to build a stronger faith.
Why: Turning to our faith can help us build emotional resilience by reminding us that we have the gift of God’s internal power within us. The Lord’s strength will empower us to overcome insurmountable obstacles, instill hope amid despair, and inspire us to find meaning in our struggles.
Trusting in God’s plan also instills a sense of peace and provides a solid foundation for resilience. #trust Click To TweetIn addition, how will we recognize God’s voice and direction if we don’t spend time with Him?
My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all, and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.” (John 10:27-30 ESV)
How: Nurture your relationship with Jesus. To grow closer takes ongoing effort and commitment on our part. By setting aside time each day to pray, read scripture, and reflect, we can build a foundation of strength that will sustain us through the ups and downs of caregiving while surrendering our worries and relinquishing control to Him. Looking for reasons to be grateful cultivates a sense of hope that helps us live resiliently.
Start a gratitude journal and write down three blessings daily. Or use an I will remember journal where you record what God has done in the past. Both will help cultivate a sense of hope that helps us live resiliently.
Choose to trust God. Then say aloud, I will trust you, God, if healing comes, illness remains, and even if death occurs.
How do you nurture your faith?
2. Connect With Others
Cultivating strong relationships with people can be instrumental in building emotional strength and resilience.
Why: Loneliness is a lack of genuine connection to others, and it’s harmful to our minds and our bodies. Others can help nurture hope and courage—and strengthen our emotional and physical health.
Having a safe space to share our feelings, receive validation, and gain valuable insights into coping strategies will help reduce our emotional burden as supporters.
Caregivers should not bear the burden alone. #caregivers #resilience Click To TweetHow: Connect with friends, family members, counselors, small groups, and support networks, such as online communities. Don’t isolate yourself.
Also, seek out people who make you laugh.
3. Embrace, Share, and Accept the Emotions
Acknowledging and accepting your emotions and those of your loved ones is crucial.
Why: Sharing and discussing your feelings is a form of self-care that can lighten your emotional burden. Stuffing them down deep usually results in an outburst or causes more damage.
How: Go ahead and name the emotions/feelings. Accept that you are having them even when they seem wrong. You might need to download a feeling wheel to assist. Also, tapping into strategies one and two will help.
Remember that two feelings can coexist; one will not cancel the other out. You can experience sadness and joy simultaneously.
4. Accept Reality
Accepting the reality of the current situation and embracing the imperfections and unpredictability that may accompany the battle is crucial to fostering resilience in ourselves.
Why: Fighting against reality won’t change it; instead, it can keep you stuck in unhappiness and bitterness. It is what it is; the sooner we accept, the quicker we can move forward with the possibility of change.
After all, when you reject reality, does it change anything?
“Pause and remember— When you fight reality, you will lose every time. Once you accept the situation for what it truly is, not what you want it to be, you are then free to move forward.”
—Jennifer Young
How: Accept all the way. Acknowledge that challenges and setbacks may arise despite our efforts. Stop looking back and longing for what was. Remember, Lot’s wife turned into a pillar of salt for looking back to see the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah.
Remember Lot’s wife! Whoever tries to keep their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life will preserve it. (Luke 17:32-33 NIV)
I know it feels counterintuitive to accept something you don’t like. It feels like you’re saying change is impossible, and I resolve myself to where we are. But that is not true; it’s the opposite. Instead, we say, “Okay, this is where we are right now; what’s next.”
5. Build Your Reserves Back Up
Caregiving can deplete your emotional reserves, so it’s vital to replenish them.
Why: When we rally to persevere through hardship, we tap into our reserves and slowly but surely drain them. Tapping ourselves out will impact our emotional stability and reduce our ability to persevere. It is always a mistake to think that we can rest later and replenish the energy used after catching up. Ongoing self-care is crucial.
For more on how I failed to replenish my reserves, read “Will You Run Out of Resilience to Embrace the Next Unexpected Trial?”
How: Rest, laughter, a healthy diet, exercise, spending time with friends, getting out in nature, and sitting with Jesus can help recharge your emotional energy. Restoring will look different for each of us.
Remember, taking a break, stepping away, and restoring yourself are vital parts of the caregiving journey.
What helps you to restore your reserves?
“There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God’s rest also rests from their works, just as God did from his.” (Hebrews 4:9-10 NIV)
Build Emotional Strength as a Caregiver
Caregiving is undoubtedly challenging yet rewarding. The toll is significant, but these five strategies will equip you with the emotional strength and resilience to support your loved ones.
Remember, the person you care for needs you. Start now! Equip yourself with emotional strength and resilience. You can boost your resilience so you never give up on those you love.
Please share what helps you to build emotional strength as a caregiver.
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These are very important strategies to share, Maree Dee! I remember evenings after getting my young children settled into bed, including my special needs child, I’d crumble on my kitchen floor. It was so hard at times. Having a good counsellor helped to make sure I did self-care and that I placed support systems around me (including asking for help, which I never wanted to…) I still had some trauma related mental health issues to deal with later that, again, I had a wonderful counsellor to help me through. Honestly, I think I’m still processing my story, but maybe one day I’ll share more with wisdom.
Lynn, I love what you said‚ that you think you are still processing your story. I think as caregivers, we often have to quickly adjust and move forward whether we are ready or not. I have no doubt I still have lots of processing to do. I’m so glad you have had a good counselor to help. I’ve been blessed in that area, too, but I moved away, so it’s time to find a new one.
Happy Thanksgiving,
Maree
This is so helpful! Thanks for sharing. I’m definitely saving this one to return to. I’m a caregiver for kids and my dad! (Sandwhich generation.)
Oh, Rebecca, you have your hands full on both ends. Sending a prayer up for you right now. Thank you for your kind words; I’m so glad my words were encouraging. Blessing, Maree
Wonderful advice Maree, having been a caregiver a few times in my life. Your strategies are extremely important.
On another note I was saddened to hear you had been so very ill my friend. I pray you’re on the mend now.
Blessings sweet friend, Jennifer
Thank you, Jennifer. I’m holding steady. Not 100% but learning to live with a few limitiations. It is such a humbling experience when other have to take care of you. I’m usually the one in the caregiving role.
I’m glad you liked the strategies. I bet you have some good ones too.
Maree
“Pause and remember— When you fight reality, you will lose every time. Once you accept the situation for what it truly is, not what you want it to be, you are then free to move forward.”
This is one of the most important points I have remember as my dear man and I walk together daily alongside Parkinson’s, the unwelcome intruder. We’re moving forward. Lisa #eyesonjesusandshine
Lisa, I love your wording, “unwelcome intruder.” Sending prayers right now for you both as you walk next to your man with your eyes on Jesus. Thank you for sharing. Blessings, Maree