When life isn’t going the way we’d hoped, it’s easy to get caught up in everything that’s wrong. I’ve certainly been there! But what happens when we start looking for what’s good instead? That’s what cultivating a grateful heart in the unexpected is all about.
When Everything Seems Wrong
Have you ever had one of those mornings when you awaken, and everything seems wrong? You look around and see the mess, the unfinished projects, the furniture that needs replacing, and you want to pull the covers over your head. Then you reach for your phone and start scrolling through social media. Yep, everyone else is enjoying beautiful vacations, picture-perfect homes, and smiling families. Before long, you’re wondering why your life doesn’t look quite so wonderful.
I’ve had those mornings. In fact, years ago, I described them this way:
I see UGLY, I feel UGLY, and I am UGLY.
Not exactly the attitude I want to carry into my day!
And sometimes, there’s a whole lot more going on than what we see around us. Maybe we’re already having a difficult day, or life has taken an unexpected turn. Whatever we’re facing, it can be hard to find something to be thankful for when all we can see is what’s wrong.
Yet I’ve discovered something important along the way:
We don’t have to pretend life is wonderful to recognize that God is still good. #Godisgood #gratitude Share on XPerhaps cultivating a grateful heart begins by asking God to help us notice what we’re missing.
A Grateful Heart Doesn’t Mean Life Is Perfect
Have you ever felt grateful for something good while still wishing your circumstances were different?
My friend Sarah taught me about gratitude while she was dying of cancer. Even in the midst of incredibly difficult days, she knew how to grab hold of something good and enjoy it while it lasted.
I watched her rest up so she could put on a fun wig, go to a show, and enjoy precious moments with her children, family, and friends. Often, those outings left her completely exhausted the following day. She was deeply saddened by all she would be losing, yet that sorrow didn’t keep her from enjoying what was right in front of her.
Sarah showed me that pain and joy can exist at the same moment. One doesn’t necessarily cancel out the other.
Over the years, I’ve learned that seeking gratitude won’t wipe away my unexpected circumstances or the difficulties I still have to face. It’s not a way to hide or put a pretty bow on life. Instead, gratitude is like a soothing ointment. It helps turn our focus back to what
God has provided right smack in the middle of our circumstances.
Learning to Become a Gratitude Seeker
Have you ever noticed that the minute you start staring at what you don’t have, it’s all you see?
I certainly have!
Years ago, I challenged myself to become what I call a “Gratitude Seeker.”
Being grateful isn’t just about saying thank you or finding the right words. It’s about where we let our thoughts wander. And have you noticed how quickly they can head straight toward everything that’s missing or going wrong?
That’s why becoming a Gratitude Seeker takes practice. We have to remind ourselves to look for what’s good, especially on the days when the bad seems to be shouting the loudest.
And sometimes we might be surprised by what we find. A little beauty where we hadn’t noticed any before. Laughter in the middle of a difficult day. Or something we’ve had all along but somehow stopped appreciating.
Today, being a Gratitude Seeker means letting the sunshine in, even if it’s only for a moment.
It’s not simply looking on the bright side. It’s learning to look for God’s goodness, even when life doesn’t look good. #Godsgoodness #gratitude Share on XHow to Cultivate a Grateful Heart
Cultivating a grateful heart doesn’t happen overnight. We practice it, one day at a time. Here are a few simple ways we can begin.
Begin with God
Let’s start by expressing our gratitude to our heavenly Father.
Psalm 100:4 reminds us:
“Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name.”
(Psalm 100:4, NIV)
My morning prayer time begins with turning to Jesus and saying hello to God. Then I jump right into naming three things I’m thankful for.
Throughout the day, I love to look out the window and whisper, “Thank You, Lord, for this beautiful day.”
Maybe you’re thanking God for a restful night’s sleep, a conversation with someone you love, or the strength to tackle another day.
But what about those mornings when we don’t feel particularly thankful? When we’re disappointed, frustrated, or wondering why God hasn’t answered our prayers?
We can tell Him that, too. And even when we’re struggling with our circumstances, we can thank Him for who He is—loving, faithful, and always present.
Sometimes a simple “Thank You, Lord” is all we can manage. And that’s enough.
Notice the Gifts Hidden in Ordinary Days
Sometimes the gifts God has for us are hidden underneath the mundane, busyness of life, or unexpected circumstances. They are waiting for discovery.
It can be as simple as closing your eyes right now. Open them and list ten things that are good in this present moment.
Can’t think of ten? Start with one.
Maybe it’s the warmth of the sunshine, the sound of laughter, a favorite song, or a quiet moment before the day gets busy.
Sometimes, for me, it’s as simple as enjoying a favorite cup of tea with God.
A habit of gratitude can help us uncover an abundance of God’s gifts, including those tucked into ordinary moments we might otherwise overlook.
We don’t have to search for something extraordinary. What is one good thing right in front of us today?
Remember God’s Faithfulness
Have you ever been so disappointed by your circumstances that it’s difficult to see what God is doing?
I have.
Sometimes I’m angry or discouraged that God hasn’t changed my circumstances, taken away my pain, or healed those I love.
During those times, it helps me to stop, pull out a piece of paper, and remember all He has done in the midst of those unexpected circumstances.
Not just the prayers He’s answered the way I hoped, but the ways He’s provided strength, comfort, and encouragement when life remained difficult.
Most likely, this side of heaven, we won’t understand why God allows so much hurt in our world.
Through recent interviews for my book, I’ve heard stories of sorrow, disappointment, and unexpected circumstances. Yet I’ve also heard how God has carried people through situations they never would have chosen.
Their stories remind me that God’s faithfulness doesn’t always mean our circumstances turn out the way we want.
Lamentations 3:22–23 reminds us that God’s steadfast love never ceases and His mercies are new every morning. Those words come from a book filled with sorrow, which makes them especially meaningful when we’re struggling to see God’s goodness.
When we remember how God has been faithful in the past, it can help us trust Him with our future, even when we don’t know what’s coming next.
Perhaps we can take a few minutes today to write down three ways God has helped us through something unexpected. They don’t have to be dramatic. Maybe He provided someone to listen, gave us strength to get through a difficult day, or reminded us of a Scripture just when we needed it.
And if we’re struggling to remember, we can ask, “Lord, help me see where You’ve been at work.”
Let’s Cultivate Gratitude Together
The best news is—it’s never too late to begin a gratitude practice.
We don’t have to wait for life to settle down. And we certainly don’t have to do it perfectly.
That’s why I’d love to invite you to join me for Embracing 30 Days of Gratitude: Cultivating a Grateful Heart in the Unexpected, beginning November 1.
Together, we’ll spend thirty days intentionally looking for God’s goodness in our ordinary and unexpected circumstances.
The accompanying workbook offers space to pause, reflect, and notice the blessings we might otherwise miss.
The workbook will be available as a free download on November 1 and 2! If you’re an email subscriber, watch your inbox on November 1 for instructions and a code to download your free copy from my store. After November 2, the workbook will be available for purchase.
This isn’t about adding another task to our already busy schedules. It’s an invitation to practice gratitude, one day at a time.
Some days, gratitude may come easily. Other days, finding one small blessing may be all we can manage.
And that’s okay.
We may not be able to change our unexpected circumstances, but with God’s help, we can cultivate a grateful heart right in the middle of them. #unexpected #gratefulheart Share on XWhat is one small blessing you’ve noticed lately, even in the midst of something difficult? I’d love to hear about it in the comments.
Embracing 30 Days of Gratitude: Cultivating a Grateful Heart in the Unexpected
Life doesn’t have to be perfect for us to cultivate a grateful heart! Join us for 30 days of noticing God’s goodness, remembering His faithfulness, and making room for joy through our gratitude workbook and daily social media challenge.
A special gift for our subscribers! Already subscribed? Watch your inbox for your FREE workbook offer! Not a subscriber yet? Sign up before November 1 to receive your exclusive code, valid November 1–2 only.
