When unwanted circumstances come your way, do you feel the need to hide your pain? Maybe for fear of being judged? It gets complicated when you toss in the word Christian. After all, shouldn’t a Christian be strong in the Lord?
Yes, but we are human too!
We can be strong in the Lord and express our pain all at the same time. One does not cancel the other out.
I balk when looking back at who I used to be. As the unexpected came my way in my younger years, I held my head high. My feelings were stuffed aside as I pretended to live in a perfect world. Although it was far from the truth, my life was riddled with imperfections and secrets.
At the time, I consumed myself with what others might think. Would they see my weakness, imperfections, or worse would they doubt my faith? So I pretended.
However, this fake facade pushes people away. Who wants a friend who can’t relate to real life? Plus, the appearance of perfect faith is built on our strength, not God’s.
But is there a right way to express our pain to God?
We can express our pain to God and others. Last week on Grace & Truth, Barbara Harper posted an article on the difference between lamenting and complaining. I love what she had to say.
She points us to scripture, where we find an array of emotions healthily expressed to God. Click over to find out what element we must be sure to include, so our lamenting isn’t an
earful of complaining.
We can have an unstoppable faith while expressing sorrow, disappointment, & even anger. After all, Jesus cried to God.
Do you feel the need to hide your pain from others and God?
Now for Our Featured Post
“It’s Okay to Say It Hurts”
By Barbara Harper
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Thank you for so faithfully linking up with the #LMMLinkup. Your post was the most clicked this past week.
Mary – Want an honor to have this post featured. Thank you. I love linking up with #LMMLinkup. Maree
Thanks for this, Maree and Barbara…I think we need to be real with others. We all struggle at times…it helps us offer compassion to others when we have ‘been there’. As for telling God? He knows anyway…we can be honest about our fears and failings when we pray.
I agree being real with each other is essential. Glad you stopped by. Maree
I so appreciate the freedom in Christ to lament or complain to God.
Nylse – Me too! Maree
I’m so glad that God can handle our laments, complaints, and whines. But our attitude DOES make a difference in our outcome ;).
Anita – Absolutely! Our attitude makes a huge difference. Sometimes I whine a bit and then announce to myself, “I’m done, time to change my attitude.” Glad you added your words to our conversation. Maree
“We can have an unstoppable faith while expressing sorrow, disappointment, & even anger. After all, Jesus cried to God.” AMEN! Thank you for sharing this and thank you for hosting the linkup! Blessings to you!
Gayl – Thank you for stopping by and I hope linking up. Maree
I tend to be very private about my pain and struggles, but I’m working on that. I know it can certainly come from pride. Thanks for your post!
Donna – I think hiding our pain can come from many sources. Pride is one of them, but I know sometimes it is hard to share my pain with someone because then they carry the pain too. You can see it in their eyes. However, God is clear we are to carry each other’s burdens. So I guess we better keep practicing. I hope you have had a great start to your week. Maree
I think that this is such an important thing to note that you can still have pain, sorrow, issues, and be a Christian. It doesn’t mean that we are imperfect. Rather that we are going through life and Christians are not immune to this. #LMMLinkUp
Amen! I love what you had to say. Thank you for joining in on the conversation. Maree
Thanks for sharing these words of wisdom!
I am so glad you stopped by. Maree
I tend to be one of those people that hides my pain. I tell everyone “I am fine”. This is an area that God contunes to work on in me. Vulnerability and honesty looks good on us when we turn to God for the healing.
Mary – You are not alone. I don’t think I hide as much, but it does creep up on me from time to time. Maree
I definitely used to be the pro cover-uper. I think it was partly in how I was raised in a type of church that would preach about grace but they did not walk in it. They more showed how we should be shamed so at a young age I learned that putting on a mask was the way to go in life. Of course that led to disaster as I was older and I am so thankful that I can go to God telling Him I do not understand and all at the same time He holds me through my moments of doubt. I am so thankful for His everlasting love and faithfulness to me. Good thoughts about this Maree!! #faithnfriendslinkup
Oh my goodness being shamed had to have been extremely difficult. I always felt okay about going to God but hid it from everyone else. I am so glad those days are over. Thank you for taking the time to share your wisdom. Maree
God’s always the best ‘go to’ when our hearts hurt!
Blessings to you Maree,
Jennifer
Yes, I agree God first.
My sibs and I just reunioned and expressed a lot of lamenting (and laughing and eating, too) and we prayed up a storm for one another. A part of paradise, for sure tho I will not miss the pain once in Glory. thanks, Maree and Barbara
Amen, to no more pain in heaven. Your time with your siblings sounded marvelous. Maree
Maree, your featured writer asks a good question. I do believe it is always the right thing to do to share your pain with God. Sometimes when we share pain with friends, it can make us feel better, but sometimes we are looking for validation of feelings that may or may not be valid. It’s a tricky question with no easy answers!
Yes, God is the best place to start. Sometimes I skip him and go to a friend who I know will side with me. It isn’t a very good plan. Thank you for stopping by. Maree
Sometimes I’ve felt as if I’m guilty of showing my pain too much! LOL I’ve stopped sharing at times due to fearing that people would think I’m a “sad sack” or always unhappy. However, in my heart I know that is not true. There is a difference between simply complaining and in sharing how God is helping me through! That’s actually why I started blogging again (after a 2 year break). I have learned that through the lessons I’ve been learning, others are being encouraged! That makes the “pain” I’ve felt have a purpose, you know? God is good – all the time! I am trusting His plan and will continue to share what He’s doing in my life for His glory!
Blessings, Joan
Oh, Joan, I can completely relate. Thank you for sharing. I too struggle with how much to share and only want to when it is helpful. Maree
Thanks for visiting my site, Maree. The statement at the top of your post is similar to what I share at the beginning of my next book. I believe there is a fear or a stigma of admitting that we feel or experience pain; especially as Christians. The beautiful thing is that God has a purpose in every painful circumstance. We must always trust Him. He wants what is best for us. Thank you for sharing. Have a fantastic weekend, and God bless.
I love what you had to say about God having a purpose for our pain. A truth, I believe in. Looking forward to hearing more about your book. Hope you had a great weeken.
Thanks for highlighting this post, Maree. I looked at it, but with the crazy week I had, I never got the chance to read it. I’ll definitely take time out today to do so.
Heather – Yes, it will be worth it. I hope your week slows down and you have a great weekend. Maree
Hay Maree, there is such a need for your featured post. My past in Church has taught me to cover up my emotions under the guise of not confessing anything negative, but all that does is teach people to be phony. We all need to be able to be genuine with our feelings. God can handle. Great pick! Thank you for hosting and have a great weekend!
Tiffiney – You bring up a great point, thank you. The last thing our churches need is a bunch of phony people. Thank you for adding to the conversation. I am sorry this was encouraged in the past to you. Maree
Thanks so much for featuring my post, Maree Dee. I am honored, and I hope it will be a blessing and an encouragement to people.
Barbara – Thank you for your beautiful words. I do think they will be a great encouragement to others. Maree
Thanks, Maree, for sharing Barbara’s wise thoughts. She has learned a lot over the course of her following life!
Michele, Yes, Barbara has some wise words to share. Maree