Standing In The Gap When It Hurts!

January 12, 2017

Standing in the Gap when it hurts
Standing In The Gap

Give me a cause or a person that can’t stand up for themselves, and I am usually all in. What about you? Do you get a thrill out of fighting for injustices or people that just need a little extra help getting what they deserve or need? I do. But what about when it hurts? Will you stand in the gap for another when the pain is so intense it hurts to breathe?

What about when the accolades are not there? When a “thank-you” is nowhere to be heard – will your stance waiver?

Society, after all, says to get rid of all the people that hurt you and treat you unfairly. Society says it is okay to give a blind eye to these people, and you should rid your life of all of them.

I shudder to think where my family would be today had we decided not to stand in the gap for a loved one.

At times I could barely catch my next breath; my hands shook with fear, and my voice quivered as I stood up to speak, beg, fight and grovel for what my loved one with a mental illness needed. I argued against professionals that said, she would not get better and that the best possible choice for everyone was “an institution for life.” I remember well-meaning people trying to convince me that I had done enough and I would be throwing my life away to continue on this path.

Refusing to listen to the chorus of voices and instead –

I quietly listened to the whispers of God.

He whispered in my ear,

“Stand in the gap for a little while; this person needs you. I will show you the way one step at a time just as I have in the past. I will equip you.”

So I stood in the gap between what was and what could be. I showed up even when I was not wanted nor spoken to with kindness. I fought for proper care, education, and for doctors to please not give up – that there was hope.

When things got rough, I could hear God whisper, “Brush it off; it is mental illness speaking not the one you love.” When doctors refused to give her the care she needed I was relentless to make sure she received it.

When I became weary, God would remind me that Christ endured much more that Jesus stood in the gap for each one of us.

I would often say if Jesus could bear the cross for me; certainly, I can do this with God’s help.

Of course standing in the gap is not an easy task. It can be challenging, painful, and scary at times. We are not called to stand in the gap for everyone. I encourage you to listen for God’s whisper and recognize that when he asks you to stand in the gap, it is an enormous privilege not to be taken lightly.

So one might ask, “Why would you stand in the gap when it is painful?” My short answers would be:

  •    Because God invited me to and he will equip.
  •    Jesus stood in the gap for me.
  •    Love conquers much.
  •    Qualities will arise that you never knew existed.


Glad that we never gave in and never gave up. Thrilled  we  listened to God and gave deaf ears to those that said, “Give up.”

Thrilled to say,  “We proved society wrong.”  It is worth the pain to stand in the gap for another.

Take the challenge this year and take on a new theme.

Stand in the gap for others that need it.

Do not make it contingent upon how they treat you, but instead, listen for God’s sweet voice and if he says; Stand in the Gap – JUST DO IT.

Of course, observe your boundaries and learn skills to do it in a healthy way. But do not pass up an opportunity just because at this point in their life they can’t give back or make you happy.

As you stand in the gap be sure to keep listening to God’s voice because one day you might hear him whispering in your ear, “Move over you don’t have to stand so strong in the gap – they are now ready to fill their own gap.

And you might be taken by surprise when the unexpected happens, and that very same person ends up standing in the gap for you.

 Will you stand in the gap for another in 2017 or listen to society and rid yourself of the pain? How have you stood in the gap for someone else?


  1. Reply


    I’m guilty. I get scared. I justify it by trying to “protect” myself. Your comment about the mental illness talking, or just realizing that other illnesses cause mood swings and changes, makes a huge difference. I need to remember this…keep it close to my heart, because when the time comes and it’s hard to stand in the gap…I will need the strength to just do it. Thankfully people stand in the gap for me at times. Thank you for your message. #livefree!!

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      I am so glad you stopped by. I agree it can be frightening and the desire to protect ourselves can be huge. No one like to be rejected or not appreciated. It is so worth it in the end, though. I too have had the same people stand in my gap.

  2. Reply

    Nicole Kauffman

    You are so right, this can be difficult and Satan tempts us on all sides to back down. But standing in the gap and following God to do so is a powerful way to bring Him glory.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Nicole, You are so right Satan tries to get us any way he can. I can’t tell you how many times I stood in the gap and would say, “God this is for you.” I love hearing your words. Maree

  3. Reply


    Wow…this post really blessed me today. Thank you, thank you for sharing!!

    God bless!!

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      I am so glad it blessed you. Thank you for stopping by.

  4. Reply


    It is definitely gut wrenching to stand in the gap for someone who is angry and lashes out or for someone who can’t appreciate it. We need God’s daily strength, that’s for sure!

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Yes, sometimes gut wrenching but so worth it. Thank you for stopping by.

  5. Reply


    Oh, bless your heart! Mine went out to you as I read of the ordeal you went through to stand up for a loved one with mental illness. Your post REALLY resonates with me, as just today, I was pleading with God in prayer for a precious family member who has literally no one to stand in the gap for him. So many see him as a lost cause, but, oh, I just remember the days of the past when he was little and so sweet and innocent. It just breaks my heart, and I started feeling the weight of the fact that if I don’t pray for him and intercede on his behalf, who will? I often think of what is riding on our own faithfulness to pray…it is a sobering thought. I loved the thoughts you shared here. This is my first visit…I am SO glad I came by. God bless you!

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      I am so glad you came by too. I am so happy that you are interceding for your precious family member. I too am sending a prayer for him. Over the years I have seen God move over and over again when things seemed hopeless. He is lucky to have you. We all needs someone from time to time to stand in the gap.

  6. Reply


    It’s so hard to stand by when others are hurting. Especially those who aren’t able to help themselves. Beautiful testimony of your experience with your loved one, Maree. Thanks for sharing and thank you for linking up at #ChasingCommunity today! Great to meet you, look forward to connecting. 🙂

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Thank you for visiting my website. I too look forward to connecting. I love your blog and thank you for the linkup.

  7. Reply


    I so agree with Kristi, Maree, and needed to be reminded of this just
    at this exact time! Thank you 😉

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Bette – I am so glad the timine was perfect. I love it when that happens. It encourages me.

  8. Reply

    Kristi Woods

    Such a powerful post, Maree Dee. I found myself cheerleading for your loved one and you as well – as you stood in the gap. Gosh, it’s such a hard thing to do at times, but following God’s prompting is never wrong. Thank you for cheerleading us to do what’s “God right” but not necessarily easy. Visiting via #chasingcommunity.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Kristi – Thank you for the cheerleading I love it. Yes, hard to stand in the gap but so worth it. I have been blessed beyond measure. It has truly been a privilege to have been given the opportunity. Had I passed I would have missed out on seeing and meeting some of the bravest people I know. Maree

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