Will You Grow in the Valley of Loss?

February 8, 2018

Not everyone learns and allows changes for the better from painful circumstances. Some people become bitter, mean, and lose their joy. Will you be the one to grow in the valley of loss? The post Includes a poem by Jane Eggleston.
Photo by Nadi Whatisdelirium on Unsplash

Not everyone learns and allows changes – for the better – from painful circumstances. Some people become bitter, mean, and lose their joy. Will you be the one to grow in the valley of loss?

What will help?

To flourish in the valley of loss one must decide upfront whether they will trust God or not.

When my loved one first got sick,  I had a conversation with our Pastor, one never to be forgotten. He looked me square in the eyes and stated, “You need to make a decision.” and then he asked,

“Will you trust God no matter what the outcome is?”

Will you be the one who grows from being in the valley of loss?  Will you end up bitter and mad at God?


At first, it seemed like a natural decision.  Of course, trusting God is what we are supposed to do. But this was entirely different.  How do we put our faith in God when our loved ones might not make it or illness may remain?

We do it anyway! We choose to trust God!

Once we make the decision, the growth seems to come automatically.

So when bad things happen, ask yourself “Do I trust God?” Then you might want to use this line  “Okay God, I have no idea why you are allowing this to happen – but I will trust you.”

Putting our trust in God no matter what the results are will grow us in the process. It will allow our pain not to be wasted.  Remember, we don’t have to like it and it doesn’t mean it won’t hurt but we choose to trust in spite of the unexpected circumstances.

 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Romans 8:28

Loved this poem and wanted to share it with you.  Shared with permission.


It’s in the Valleys I Grow

Sometimes life seems hard to bear,
Full of sorrow, trouble and woe.
It’s then I have to remember
That it’s in the valleys I grow.

If I always stayed on the mountain top
And never experienced pain,
I would never appreciate God’s love
And would be living in vain.

I have so much to learn
And my growth is very slow.
Sometimes I need the mountain tops,
But it’s in the valleys I grow.

I do not always understand
Why things happen as they do.
But I am very sure of one thing.
My Lord will see me through.

My little valleys are nothing
When I picture Christ on the cross.
He went through the valley of death;
His victory was Satan’s loss.

Forgive me Lord, for complaining
When I’m feeling so very low.
Just give me a gentle reminder
That it’s in the valleys I grow.

Continue to strengthen me, Lord
And use my life each day
To share your love with others
And help them find their way.

Thank you for valleys, Lord
For this one thing I know.
The mountain tops are glorious
But it’s in the valleys I grow!

by Jane Eggleston


What helps you grow in the valley of loss? 

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  1. Reply


    What a great, and necessary, question! And we all need someone in our lives who will ask us one like that.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Sarah, You are so correct we need people to ask us that question. Maree

  2. Reply

    Donna Reidland

    Many of us have had to make that decision and the rest of us may well need to in the future. Thanks for pointing us to the truth about its importance.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Donna, So true all of us at some point will need to decide. We all will have losses. Blessings, Maree

  3. Reply

    Lori Schumaker of Seaching for Moments

    Aiy … a big question. One that makes us face the depth of our faith. Will we trust Him even when the answers don’t come? Even when pain comes and resolve never comes? Trust. I know that even when the valleys felt deep, God was there. From the top of the next mountain I’ve been able to see the good He created from the broken and I was able to witness the deepening of my trust. Thank you, my friend, for the powerful reminder of hope. And thank you for sharing it with us at #MomentsofHope ♥

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      I love your words, “From the top of the next mountain I’ve been able to see the good He created from the broken.” If only we could always remember just wait we will see his good. He knows what he is doing. Thank you for stopping by and leaving such beautiful words. Blessings, Maree

  4. Reply

    Debbie Wilson

    Maree, thank you for this beautiful reminder of truth that gives us hope.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Debbie, Thank you for stopping by and leaving an encouraging comment. Maree

  5. Reply

    Bettie G

    Thank you for these beautiful words. I am being taken deeper into trusting God also, and finding that the trust goes so much deeper than even my feelings about trust. I loved the poem! I am so grateful for the encouragement that you have shared here.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Bettie, I am so glad this post encouraged you. Thank you for stopping and taking time to comment. I hope you have an awesome day. Maree

  6. Reply


    Trusting God is always the best thing to do, even when it seems hard. I know He has brought me through many trials and those times have brought me closer and helped my trust to grow. Blessings to you, Maree! I’m your neighbor at #TrekkingThru.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Hi Neighbor – Thank you for stopping by and reading. God is pretty amazing, isn’t he? I find the more I trust, the easier it is the next time to trust a little sooner. Blessings, Maree

  7. Reply


    I am glad you wrote this amazing post on trusting God. It is a post I recently wrote as well “ Trusting God in the difficult seasons of life”

    The Holy Spirit wanted to emphasis on this matter again and again.

    God is in the midst of our valleys , and that assurance makes us less lonely

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Thank you! I would love to read your post. If you leave me the link, I will head over. Maree

  8. Reply

    Wise Hearted

    What helps me is knowing that God does not waste a thing. Learning to not have out of the bible expectations helps me also. Just because I feel one way does not mean God is going to keep me that way, He will bring me through it and I have the choice how I end up when I am through it, praising or complaining.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Betty, Yes, Amen, God will not waste a thing. I love what you said about not having “out of the Bible expectations.”Those darn expectations can get us into a ton of trouble. Thank you for adding your inspiring words to our chat today. Blessings, Maree

  9. Reply


    Oh, so much truth here, Maree! God has dealt with me about the fact that when I am refusing to trust that His plan is always best, it is revealing that I am suspicious of Him. I never thought of lack of trusting God, in this light, but it is true. If we don’t trust a person, it shows that we are suspicious of them or their motives. I think it is the same with God. We know, theoretically, that God is GOODNESS personified, and His thoughts are way above ours, and He sees things that we do not see. But, when it comes to Him giving us an answer that we don’t like or want to hear, our “theories” go right out the window. To really, truly trust God is something that I believe we learn over time, as we can look back and trace His hand and see that, even when our will has not aligned with His, He always did what was for our ultimate best. So many times, He has allowed an outcome that I did not prefer, but He has taught me that when I cannot understand His logic, I must trust His wisdom. He is always right. Thank you for another deeply edifying post. God bless you, my friend. 🙂

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Cheryl, Your words are speaking volumes to me today. Yes, we must trust him in everything. What we ultimately want is his will because we know it is right. However, it is hard always to trust right at the beginning. . Verbalizing my trust in him helps me a ton. God has allowed so many outcomes I don’t prefer and good has come of it. I still don’t like it, but I trust his plan is right. Thank you for visiting and adding your wisdom and experience to the chat. Maree

  10. Reply

    Kalyani Nagarajan

    Needed this so very badly…..been through horrible and devastating storms starting in October and still going through. ….someone I trusted left me broke and homeless after helping her with almost all of my savings. It has been a very painful betrayal that crushed my inner core and left me hopeless, helpless, and suicidal at times. I am going from one home to another, and the Lord is still providing shelter and food.
    I will keep moving forward, at times I feel scared and vulnerable.
    I know God will take my ashes and give me His beauty. But first, I must forgive the person who betrayed and used me. I need to give this situation over to God and let that person go.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Kalyani, I am so sorry for all that you have gone through since October. I love how your faith shines through, and you know the steps you need to take. Still, it is hard. I am praying for you, and I am so glad my post was helpful. Blessings, Maree

      1. Reply

        Kalyani Nagarajan

        THANK YOU, Maree….
        I am doing much better….I am slowly rising out of my ashes and receiving God’s beauty. It has been a very hard journey and the good Lord is carrying me through…I began to sing again and have a spring in my step. Yes….I see His loving hand and His faithfulness.
        I remember what my pastor said when going through difficult hard times…to set our mind on Heaven where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. To keep fixing our thoughts on things that are above and not on things of this earth. For the things which we see are temporal, but the things which are unseen are Eternal. I love that !!🤗🤗🤗Soon we will be with
        Christ and rejoice with our loving God forever and ever. Jesus is preparing a home for each of his beloved child and we will have an eternal home not built by man but by God. A new Jerusalem…the
        city of our God!! I thank God I have Jesus!! The apostle Paul must be having a glorious time and so will we!! Titus: “Waiting for that blessed hope..the glorious appearing of our great God and Savior the Lord Jesus Christ!”

        1. Reply

          Maree Dee

          Kalyani, Thank you for your beautiful words, so full of hope.I agree fixing out thoughts on what is above is so helpful. I am so glad you are rising out of your ashes and singing again.

          Oh, how I wish I could carry a tune. I love to sing, but God did not bless me with a beautiful voice. Maree

  11. Reply


    We are walking a hard season with health right now too. I was praying in the wee hours one night and heard God’s whisper, “Trust me”. Let’s just say it’s been a time of hard won growth but an unexplainable peace. We’ve also experienced the love of our church family in entirely new ways.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Loretta, I am so sorry you are in a hard season. Praying! I am glad you have that unexplainable peace. Isn’t it amazing and hard to explain?

  12. Reply

    Kristi Woods

    Trust – oh goodness. It’s easy to offer it when all seems bright and perky, doesn’t it? I had a conversation just today, one that touched on this very issue. It’s good we spur one another on, to walk in trust of our Lord even when the clouds gather. Wonderful encouragement today. Visiting via #chasingcommunity.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Kristi, Thank you for visiting I hope you come back. Yes, it is so good to have one another to spur each other on. Thank you for your encouraging words. Blessings, Maree

  13. Reply


    Such truth, friend. It’s a hard truth to accept, but somehow, at the very same time, it’s a freeing truth. — And, great poem. Thanks for sharing. ((Hug))

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Brenda – Thank you for stopping by and hosting such a wonderful link-up. Maree

  14. Reply

    Theresa Boedeker

    Remembering the final outcome of this struggle on earth helps me in hard times. How nice to know the ending to God’s story and our story. This doesn’t mean there will not be hard times, but I know the ending ahead of the end.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Theresa – Amen to knowing the ending! It does bring peace even in the midst of pain. Maree

  15. Reply


    Yes, I think we have to preach to ourselves daily, that we trust the Sovereign Lord, currently my verse is Isaiah 26:4 I will trust in the Lord, the Lord God forever, for He is the rock eternal.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      I love your verse! I am going to have to pin that one up on my board. Thank you for sharing. Maree

  16. Reply


    I am just where you were. A good friend’s cancer is not going the way anyone hoped. She is young with young children and so full of life… yet dying. It is so hard to make sense of situations like these. But yet even in the middle of unfathomable situations, there is God. He never told us life would make sense. He told us to trust Him. And that means sometimes we have to make a deliberate conscious decision to believe even when we cannot see. Thanks for sharing this important question we all have to face eventually.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Karen, Thank you for adding to the conversation. I know for me things go so much easier when I know I will choose trust up front. It is as if a load is taken off. Sorry for your losses. Praying for your good friend and you as you stand by her. Blessings, Maree

  17. Reply

    Michele Morin

    It’s always such a surprise to come through a dark time and to find God there in the midst of it–and then to realize at the end of the valley that growth has taken place!
    Blessings to you, Maree! Thanks for this wisdom, hard won, I’m sure.

    1. Reply

      Maree Dee

      Michele – I agree! God is always with us, and we can grow in the valleys. Blessings, Maree

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